Family traditions – new and old

When I was growing up, Christmas time was filled with traditions.

I always looked forward to frosting cookies with our family friends, listening to Christmas music by only the lights of the Christmas tree and watching countless Christmas movies. On Christmas Eve, we went to the children’s Mass where Santa quietly prayed in front the manger before heading out to deliver presents, had our annual bacon-wrapped steak dinner and drove around to look at Christmas lights.

On Christmas morning, my siblings and I woke up extremely early, passed out all the presents and opened gifts rotating from youngest to oldest. Then we ate our mom’s egg bake for breakfast and spent the afternoon with my mom’s side of the family at my Nana’s house.

Christmas just wasn’t the same if those things didn’t happen.

My daughter decorating a sugar cookie – one of several
Christmas traditions in our house.

I remember feeling a bit depressed that first Christmas away from home after being married when I couldn’t participate in our Christmas routine. As much as I enjoyed being with my new husband and his family for the holidays, I missed being with my family, doing what you were “supposed to do” on Christmas.

Now my husband and I have incorporated old traditions with new ones. We still bake and frost Christmas cookies and look at Christmas lights. But we also buy a new Christmas ornament that symbolizes something special that happened over the course of the year.

Whatever your traditions, it’s important to have some, said Laura Buddenberg, manager of youth care training at Boys Town.

Traditions give everyone – children and adults – something to plan for and look forward to at specific times of the year, she said. They also help families set priorities.

“If your family has a tradition of gather for Advent wreath prayer, for example, your children will prompt you to make time for that no matter how busy things get,” she said.

I know that to be true. A few times already my daughter has reminded us to do the Advent wreath in the evening.

Buddenberg said traditions teach children that family matters deeply and that some things are worth keeping and nurturing over time – the family Advent calendar, certain ornaments for the tree or participation in the parish Advent service project, favorite family recipes.

This year I made my dad’s favorite Christmas cookies – Ritz crackers and peanut butter covered in chocolate almond bark. I always think of him when I make them.

God creates families, and children learn who they from their families, Buddenberg said. Traditions provide some framework and structure for that identity, she said.  

“You can see kids light up when they talk about ‘what we do in our family at Christmas,’” Buddenberg said. “Traditions tell them they belong to people who love them.”

By definition, traditions are practices that are passed down from one generation to another. They provide a way to share an experience together in the present, while remembering loved ones who aren’t physically with us anymore, she said.

One of my treasured Christmas gifts is a book of handwritten Christmas recipes from my Nana, who died eight years ago. During the Advent season she baked goodies with her grandchildren, so whenever I make her peanut butter balls or chocolate mint cookies, I think of her.

What traditions to you celebrate during Advent and Christmas? Tell us about them on our Facebook page or by commenting on this blog.

You can find some great suggestions for honoring traditions, and creating new ones, on the Boys Town parenting website, www.parenting.org.

Blogged by Lisa Maxson, Senior Writer/Reporter